Archive for the 'Copycat Adoptions' Category

I’d Like a Quiet Yellow One Next

Friday, January 12th, 2007

“I lost the receipt for this baby, but I was wondering if I could still return it.”

Madonna says David is a champion tantrum-thrower.

Uninspired Post (But Cute Outfit)

Monday, January 8th, 2007

Angelina Jolie praises Madonna Adoption.

Angelina Jolie Talks About Madonna's Adoption

Meanwhile, Brad claims more babies are on the way.

Meanwhile, today I wore:

  • Hair ironed, right parted, low pony until I deliberately walked in the rain and got my hair frizzy
  • South Sea pearl earrings
  • On lips: L’Oreal Sweet Nude
  • Red, green, brown plaid ruffled tuxedo shirt from Zara
  • Gray angora blend v-neck sweater from Zara
  • Black belt with silver buckle
  • Charcoal Editor Express pants
  • Black Via Spiga slingback loafer pumps
  • Outerwear: Black Ellen Tracy coat, grey knit cap from Ralph Lauren, grey plaid scarf, black suede zip-up boots

Meanwhile, at the Home for Unwed Fathers…

Friday, January 5th, 2007

The latest celebrity copycat: Leonardo DiCaprio, who’s “adopted” a little South African girl. He’ll reportedly “parent” the smart way — exclusively long distance.

And you thought he was just another pretty face. Turns out he also has a heart, a telephone and a checkbook.

She’s Number One!

Wednesday, January 3rd, 2007

Baby David’s father says: I Don’t Have Madonna’s Number

David's Father: I Don't Have Madonna's Number

“”I don’t have her phone and mailing addresses. All I want is to find out how my son is but I don’t know how I can do it,” David’s daddy says.

Come on, David’s Daddy. If you really want to find out how your son is doing, just read the papers like everybody else.

Baby David Lands in New York

Monday, October 30th, 2006

Baby David

Madonna and David arriving in New York (Splash News)

The red string around Baby David’s wrist is some sort of Kabbalah thing.

Adopt Us, Too

Saturday, October 28th, 2006

Dear Madonna,

We just heard that you spent a fortune on winter clothes for your new acquisition.

Needless to say, we’re dying of jealousy. We too have skin color different from yours; were born in a faraway country no-one has heard of; and have exotic eye shape and hair texture.

Most importantly, we know all the words to at least seven of your songs, and in these troubled times we offer you a snippet to sing to Baby David’s Malawi dad:

Papa don’t preach
I’m in trouble deep
Papa don’t preach

I’ve been losing sleep
But I’ve made up my mind, I’m keeping my baby
Oooh I’m gonna keep my baby, yeah.

So please please please adopt us, too. For this week only, we offer ourselves at the bargain price of only $1 Million each. Since we’re bigger than Baby David and can double as au pairs, we’re worth every penny, we promise.



P.S. Why the girl clothes? Do you want him to hate you?

Baby David’s Biological Dad Changes Tune

Thursday, October 26th, 2006

Ay, Dios mio!

The father now shifts the blame from Madonna and the media to the “so-called human rights groups” trying to protect his son (but not really). He says he is now spending more time talking to reporters than tending to his crops.

The human rights groups says they are trying to make sure that Baby David gets inheritance, and is amply protected psychologically in case of a Madonna and Guy Ritchie divorce.

Father Still Worried About Madonna Adoption

Baby David’s Interim Mother Speaks

Wednesday, October 25th, 2006


Madonna has to thank the power of Oprah. She scored a lot of PR points today. We now believe she did the right thing, although her team could have taken some extra measures to protect the identity of Baby David’s family since at it is apparent, the people of Malawi are going crazy with the attention a star of Madonna’s caliber can bring. If you think about it — according to what we have read in the press — what exactly is the motivation of Baby David’s biological father now? To get Baby David back — in the light of the fact that he had already left him in an orphanage since he was two weeks old one year ago? Or to reword the adoption papers to say that his baby is actually on loan until he is a certain age? Who puts up a child on loan and still claim parent’s rights? Doesn’t make sense.

So Baby David, here’s to a great life in London. As we can see with these pictures, your new family loves you.



More screencaps after the jump!


Madonna Blames Media for Adoption Firestorm

Wednesday, October 25th, 2006

Madonna Blames Media for Adopt Firestorm (AP)

Madonna told Oprah Winfrey Tuesday she was surprised by the firestorm surrounding her efforts to adopt a 13-month-old boy from the African country of Malawi. And she blamed the media for it.

Madonna taped the interview via satellite from London, for airing Wednesday. It was the first time she’d spoken publicly in depth about the adoption.

According to a member of the “Oprah” audience, Madonna said she was startled by press reports about the toddler’s father, Yohane Banda, who was quoted last week as saying he didn’t realize he was signing away custody of his son, David, “for good.”

“She said she met with the father, she looked him in the eye,” audience member Sheryl Lewis recounted.

The Nouvelist says: OK, were going to TIVO Oprah on Wednesday.

Baby David’s Biological Dad: No Adoption

Monday, October 23rd, 2006

Father ‘not told about Madonna adoption plan’ (Independent UK)

But the boy’s father, Yohane Banda, 32, said Malawian government officials told him that David would be cared for by the millionaire singer until he was old enough to come home and work on the small family farm.

“What we agreed with Madonna was that she looks after my child until he finishes school, becomes independent and comes back home to us,” he said. “Had they told us that Madonna wanted to adopt my son and make him her own son, we would not have agreed to that.”

His cousin, Wiseman Zimba, added: “Our understanding as a family is that David is still part and parcel of our clan. After the good woman nurtures and educates him, he will return back.”

The Nouvelist says: What a mess! The future I see —

Teenager David: “I hate you!”
Madonna: “Shut up. I paid $3 mil for your sorry ass and lost precious PR points in the process, so you better love me Malawian boy!”