Archive for the 'Public Service Announcements' Category


Tuesday, May 13th, 2008

I have no words.

In the News…

Wednesday, January 9th, 2008

Microsoft Bids for Norwegian Search Software

In other news, Bean at 36W 5D is fat, healthy, and still oriented properly. Keep your head down, little boy.

I yell because I love you.

Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007

Why you shouldn’t keeo your emotions bottled up (if you’re a woman).

Yes, We Know, But We Know You’ll Forgive Us.

Wednesday, August 1st, 2007

Gentle Readers:

As we progressed from Honeymooners to Old Smug Marrieds, we tracked our own milestones with analogous milestones in Shiloh’s young life. We obsessed over Shiloh’s growth from Blob to Babe and rejoiced with her parentals over each of her triumphs.

Sadly, Shiloh’s first birthday marked, for us, the end of an era. While we continued to revel in her well-being, we noticed a slight diminution in our Shiloh Obsession. No longer did we care so desperately or passionately about her every phase; no longer did we plot her arch-rival’s downfall. We looked at her photograph and continued to find her adorable, but the love was gone.

Fortunately for our readership, we have a new Celebrity Bump to monitor.

Not Nicole’s, you dolts.

Introducing: Bean the Wonder Bump, gifted with the amazing power to cause uncontrollable flatulence in its current vessel (shown here at exactly 32 years, 16 hours and 18 minutes):

Welcome Bean at Fourteen!

Watch this space for developments.



P.S. See, we told you you’d forgive us.

In Praise of Excess

Sunday, May 6th, 2007

Me likey.

Why We Heart Prince

Thursday, April 26th, 2007

Prince publicly mocks Paris for lack of singing ability.

Happy April 23!

Monday, April 23rd, 2007

Among the many things that make today special (Shakespeare’s birth anniversary, the day after Earth day, Monday), Monster today marked six months at Place of Employment! Monster takes this occasion to indulge in smug self-congratulatory applause, and completes the celebratory saga with this article. Live long and prosper, my young lawyer friends!

At Least It’s Not Scientology

Saturday, April 21st, 2007

Madonna continues plans for world domination.

(Oh, and in case you were wondering: Yes, I DO read the Daily Mail on a regular basis.)

I Don’t Believe This

Saturday, April 21st, 2007

Internet porn’s popularity waning.

(Oh, and in case you were wondering: No, I do NOT read The Economist on a regular basis.)

Movies That Need Making

Sunday, April 15th, 2007

Sienna Miller as Barbarella.

Go babies, cast Sienna over Angie.