Archive for the 'Curses Foiled Again' Category

Today’s Cute Outfit: Monday, 16 April 2007

Monday, April 16th, 2007

Today’s outfit was soooo cute that I just had to share:

  • Hair ironed, left parted, jaunty pony
  • South Sea pearl earrings
  • On lips: MAC Viva Glam
  • Around neck: Pearl choker from Greenhills
  • Short black knit dress with cap sleeves and pockets from Mango
  • Wide black patent leather belt from Zara
  • Grey pantyhose
  • Black patent leather roud-toe Bally pumps
  • Olsen twins-esque sunglasses
  • Outerwear: Bone colored Banana Republic trench, Burberry scarf
  • Purse: Tiger-striped B. Cavalli leather purse
  • Scent: D&G Light Blue

Today’s Cute Outfit: Wednesday, 21 March 2007

Wednesday, March 21st, 2007
  • Hair ironed, worn in high pony
  • South Sea pearl earrings
  • On lips: MAC Viva Glam
  • On skin: fake tan, courtesy of Dove
  • White button-down Sisley shirt, with cuffs rolled up to biceps
  • Usual rings
  • Red woven cotton and leather belt from H&M
  • Brown pants with small check pattern from Mango
  • High pointy red Mary Janes
  • Bag: Crumpler Wonder Weenie, red
  • Outerwear: red cashmere zip-up cardigan, hideously expensive black leather jacket

Today’s Cute Outfit: Friday, 2 March 2007

Saturday, March 3rd, 2007
  • Hair ironed, worn in dissheveled updo
  • South Sea pearl earrings
  • On lips: Cherry Chap-stick
  • Brown turtleneck from H&M
  • Red, orange and blue garrison belt from Greenhills tiangge
  • Brown jeans
  • Red boots
  • Outerwear: Puffy Via Spiga jacket

Today’s Cute Outfit: Thursday, 1 March 2007

Thursday, March 1st, 2007
  • Hair ironed, right parted, worn in low pony
  • White gold and diamond matte-finish hoop earrings
  • On lips: Trader Joe’s Virtuosity lip balm
  • White tuxedo shirt from Banana Republic
  • Orangey-red v-neck sweater from H&M
  • White garrison belt from Greenhills tiangge
  • Black Tahari pants
  • Red Nine West boots
  • Outerwear: Puffy black jacket, grey black red white scard, red suede gloves

Today’s Cute Outfit: Monday, 12 February 2007

Monday, February 12th, 2007
  • Hair ironed, worn down
  • Small diamond marquise-cut earrings
  • Diamond cross pendant
  • Pink Thomas Pink shirt with French cuffs, worn uncuffed
  • Hot pink merino wool Banana Republic sweater
  • Usual rings
  • Grey tweed J. Crew trousers
  • High pointy black boots
  • Outerwear: Puffy black Via Spiga jacket, hot pink Banana Republic zip-up cardigan, suede boots, pink “cashmere” scarf from NY sidewalk

Monster still misses Trog.

I Have No Capacity

Sunday, February 11th, 2007

Spent the week cheating on K with F, a very cute partner in another practice group who suckered me into joining a project with the initial representation that it would take no more than fifteen minutes of my time. “This is a very small thing,” he said. “Fix this draft, then boom-boom-boom, you’re done.” That initial “very small thing” took me three hours, of course, after which I reported back to F. “Very good,” he said. “Now, fix these other two things.” Before I knew it there were eight “small things” that had somehow landed on my desk, all requiring my urgent attention. Progression from drafting to signing to closing all occurred in four days.

On Wednesday the principals signed the deal that had consumed most of my working day for the past four months. Signing took place in another time zone, and K and I were kept busy after hours merrily finalizing the document we sent to our foreign counterparts. And after the celebratory woo-hoo when we shot out our last email, K stopped by my room en route to the elevators.

“Share a cab home?” he asked. “Can’t,” I answered. “Working for F on other equally urgent affairs.”

“What?!?!” K said. “You’re still not going home?”

“No,” I sighed, and returned to working on Big Important Things.

On Thursday morning K arrived to see me on the floor, papers radiating from my supine form.

“I’m going to teach you something very important,” he said. “‘I have no capacity.’ That’s a direct translation from a Norwegian phrase, and I hear it all the time. Use it and it will save your life.”

I have no capacity. Brilliant. Because it really is true: I have no capacity, in any arena.

On Friday K’s good morning greeting was accompanied with: “I need you to drop everything for the next ninety minutes and work on this.”

“K, I have no capacity,” I said.

“Of course you do. I taught you that, so you can’t use it on me.

Early Warning Device

Monday, February 5th, 2007

God-Empress, because you asked (although this is useful only to me):

I work with my back to the door in my centrally located walled-in corridor, where it can get pretty darn noisy. Outside my window is a large construction scaffold, with an equipment elevator that goes up and down incessantly; only a glass wall divides me from the busy legal soldiers traipsing along on their way to the stairs or the printer.

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Thwarted Nerdhood, or, I Need a Life

Sunday, February 4th, 2007

Being a tad melancholy after I left Trog at the train station, I attempted to walk off my mood and aimlessly wandered through the city in search of diversion. I saw very little of interest in Oslo this Sunday morning; shops and cafes were closed, there were very few people, and the sunshine deprived me of even the moderate entertainment value of shivering against the cold.

As I am a creature of habit my feet turned of their own accord and I soon found myself strolling toward Place of Employment.

Pop in for five minutes? I thought. It’s a Sunday morning, I have nothing better to do, and I may as well get a head start on the week’s tasks. There’s a binder of documents sitting prettily on my desk that I wouldn’t mind leafing through right about now. Why not?

Here’s why not:

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Partial Drafts

Friday, February 2nd, 2007

My one problem with having a Real Job is that it deprives me of valuable time to post on this blog, and hence deprives you, Gentle Reader, of my rapier wit, cunning insight and Answers to the Ultimate Questions about Life, the Universe and Everything. Here is a partial list of posts that I’ve partially written:

1. I Heart Netflix

My distant days of Brooklyn bumhood centered around the arrival of Mr. Chinese Postman, who’d hand me a red envelope (or two or three)….

2. Spweading the Gwospel of the Pwincess Bwuttercwup

Buttercup was raised on a small farm in the country of Florin, and Monster’s happy high school life in the small country of Bilaan….

3. Top Five Moments on the Job Front (Today)

Spending two hours creating one PowerPoint slide….

4. Hair as Metaphor

My hair used to be unruly and rebellious; now it’s artificially relaxed….

5. Early Warning Device

I work with my back to the door, and there’s a little game that I play when I hear approaching footsteps….

6. Screwing Like a Man

After only seventeen attempts, Trog quit trying to assemble our IKEA dresser….

Had I the time, I would rush to complete and serve these amazing expositions on human nature. Unfortunately, Gentle Reader, you’ll have to be satisfied with crumbs. And imagine Trog and Monster in their cute outfits, having mundane conversations and gobbling up potato chips by the bagful.

Today’s Cute Outfit: Tuesday, 30 January 2007

Tuesday, January 30th, 2007
  • Hair ironed, right parted, worn down
  • Small ruby earrings
  • On lips: Carmex
  • Royal blue and white striped Benetton shirt
  • Navy, cream and red argyle angora sweater from some random store in Aker Brygge
  • Usual rings
  • Red belt from H&M
  • Black Editor pants from Express
  • Red floral socks
  • High pointy red Mary Janes
  • Outerwear: Black shearling duffle coat, black suede boots, red knit cap from H&M, grey plaid scarf